We arrived
in the lands of our ancestors in June 1941, fresh from the fjords of
Norway; each of us determined to teach the Reds that their masters
had returned; that Russia belonged to us; the sons of the Rus. A
thousand years ago, everyone from the black forests of Prussia to the
Dnieper, from the Baltic to the Black Sea, had paid gafol to the
Vikings. Now we were back and we claimed our tribute in Bolshevik
blood.
Proudly,
we wore our Wiking armband, our mark of belonging to a brotherhood of
heroes. And like the Vikings of old, we took whatever we wanted.
Long gone were the days of swords and shields, we used machine guns
and tanks, sending thousands upon thousands of souls up as our
offering to Odin, as we scythed our way across the steppes. One Eye
was happy, none could stand against us and we were soon cheering as
we watched shells falling around the Kremlin's spires.
But Odin
is a God of changeable mood; just when we thought our victory was
certain, he decreed that our offering was not enough. For our
sacrifice to please him, it had to be pure, free from any goal, other
than the spilling of blood in His name, a seat in Valhalla, our sole
reward for our devotion to Him.
And so we
killed and killed again. Back through those ill fated names;
Stalingrad; Kursk; Kharkov. Each a desperate rearguard action, where
Wiking was left to stand alone against the growing darkness that
poured out of the east. Until finally, we came to our nemesis,
Korsun.
We spent
every day and every night, from 24th January to 16th
February 1944 dying, so that our Wehrmacht comrades might survive.
Even so, despite our best efforts, by the second week of February,
the German forces were penned into an area roughly three miles across
and the situation was desperate.
In one
last, desperate attempt to break out, my section was given the honour
of holding the village of Shanderovka, until the last of the other
units had withdrawn past Hill 239 and crossed the river beyond to the
relative safety of Lisyanka. What the great High Command failed to
take into consideration, was that one entire flank of the intended
path of retreat, was still held by the Bolsheviks. This was to be
Wiking's Ragnarok and the few of us that survived it, would never be
the same again.
In pitch
darkness on the night of the 16th February, the German
army began its retreat, leaving, nearly three hundred men of Wiking,
to delay the Reds for as long as possible. Nearly two thousand years
before, the men of Sparta had made this same sacrifice at
Thermopylae, their names being sung throughout time because of their
heroism. Why then is it, that the names of the men of Wiking have
been lost in the mists of the distant past? If they are recalled at
all, it is only as demons to scare spoilt Russian brats into behaving
themselves.
Were our
sacrifices not as great as those of the men from ancient Greece? Did
we not freely give our blood that the light of freedom might shine a
little longer? Did we not stand against the eastern hoard, that you
might sleep safely in your bed today?
No sooner
had the last of the retreating troops left the village, than there
was the sound of gunfire behind us, an ill omen of things to come.
But we had no time to think of that, as by 01.00 the first Bolsheviks
came to see if there was still anyone at home in Shanderovka.
We waited
until they were almost on top of us, so that we couldn't possibly
miss, then cut them down in their hundreds. But as one died, two
took his place. No matter how many lives we reaped, there were
always more and we were soon locked in deadly hand to hand combat,
where it was every man for themselves.
We killed
with bullets and grenades until these ran out. Then we fought on
with bayonets, entrenching tools, knives, boots, fists and teeth. We
were plastered in so much blood, that we couldn't tell what was the
enemies' and what was our own. We were like the berserkers of the
past, gripped by a battle madness that made us virtually immune to
wounds. The only time we stopped fighting, was when we died.
This is
what Odin had demanded of us in tribute to His name. There was no
thought as to why we were killing. No concern for our comrades, or
even our own survival. We killed simply so that we could kill again.
Like deadly automated robots from some crazy science fiction film,
we waded through spilt blood and guts, stumbled over fallen bodies,
with the single purpose of getting to our next victim.
Our
screams were those of battle frenzy, our limbs moved of their own
accord. The Valkyries sang the ancient sagas, as they chose the
latest heroes to join Odin in His last battle. Until finally, we
found ourselves alone, in a night lit by the ruddy flames of the
burning village around us.
There was
an eerie silence, that can only come when the cacophony of battle
falls silent. There was nobody left to kill, none of the enemy at
least. But mercy decreed that our offering of death was not yet
complete. Although the enemy was gone for the moment, we had
fulfilled our objective and it was now time for us to leave
Shanderovka to its fate. Before we could do this however, we had to
give our wounded brothers as painless a death as possible.
Everyone
of us had seen what the Reds did to anyone stupid enough to be taken
alive by them. Prisoners faced an agonising death, that could last
for days. So, we went in search of guns that still had bullets, then
tended to those we called our friends, who were not fit enough to
take one more walk with us.
I found
Bjorn, sprawled against what was left of a cottage wall. He was
holding in his guts that were trying to spill out of his ripped open
belly. He smiled when he saw me coming through his bleary eyes. We
had grown up in Trondheim together, had skipped school to go fishing
together. Had sailed to Germany in our quest for adventure together.
And now, we would share his last moments on this world together.
I knelt
beside him in the bloody snow and passed him the butt of my
cigarette. He took a pull, his eyes locked on mine. I had no
bullets to send him on his final journey but in a way, it was more
fitting that a blade would end his life. He started to take another
pull on the cigarette and I skilfully slid the bayonet between his
ribs. His eyes widened for a brief moment, before the light went out
of them forever.
It is one
thing to kill a stranger at a distance with a gun, another to kill
him up close with a knife. Yet it is something completely different
to watch the life leaving the eyes of someone you love. I knelt
beside Bjorn for a moment, lost in memories of the past we had
shared. Then put my hand on his cheek, my tears running unchecked,
as I said farewell to my friend.
The rest
of the division had held the southern section of the line of retreat,
so, our final act of kindness done, the remaining one hundred and
eighty of us followed their trail, our plan being to reach the tiny
bridge over the Gniloy Tikich river before the Russian army got there
ahead of us.
Gunfire
was still lighting up the sky in front of us, seeming much too
intense to bode anything good and we hadn't been marching for more
than half an hour, before we came across the first German bodies.
The evidence of fighting increased as we pressed into the night and
it wasn't much longer before we caught up with stragglers from the
retreating column.
We had
been picking up whatever weapons we could find as we marched and now
had an assortment guns, even having found two MG42's. So we rounded
up all the stragglers that we found who could still walk, forming a
defensive ring around them as we continued towards our own lines.
Deadly field grey ghosts, walking through a twilight world.
We reached
the edge of a small grove of trees, just as day was breaking. Before
us was a scene out of Dante's pictures of hell. Horse-drawn wagons,
clearly marked with red crosses, were being used as playthings by
Russian T-34's, like cats playing with blind mice. We watched
helplessly as wagon after wagon of German wounded was crushed beneath
the tracks of the Russian Goliaths, until their red stars were all
but lost under countless layers of blood and gore.
I stood
frozen as I watched a medical orderly pick up a fallen rifle to stand
between a wounded horse and an oncoming tank. He emptied the
magazine at the armoured monster, then threw himself at it in a
futile attempt to make it turn away from the helpless animal. He
slid beneath the tracks a moment before the tank ploughed over the
horse, sending its life blood geysering into the morning sky to stain
the surrounding snow. Gunfire and revving engines all but drowned
out the screams of the wounded and dying, making the slaughter seem
strangely surreal as we watched helplessly from our shelter amongst
the trees.
There was
nothing we could do against armour, so we turned back into the forest
until we could safely resume our course west once more. But what
would have been an easy stroll in other circumstances, took us all
morning to achieve, with running gun battles and hiding from
marauding Russian tanks. And the whole time, there was the constant
sound of gunfire coming from our left. Testimony that something was
going terribly wrong indeed.
We
eventually reached the bridge at just after noon, to find the
majority of the division had already crossed the river. It was about
forty five feet wide here and extremely fast flowing, which made
crossing it a daunting task to say the least. The original bridge
had been destroyed by enemy gunfire but tanks and lorries had been
driven into the icy waters, then trees had been felled to form a
makeshift bridge, over which a steady stream of soldiers was
struggling with their wounded comrades.
We
rejoined our unit, that was forming the outer defensive ring of the
river crossing and the killing began all over again for us. This
time, we had some old mark four tanks with us and some of the new
Panthers were giving us supporting fire from the far bank of the
river. But still wave upon wave of Bolsheviks threw themselves
against us, their sole purpose being to crush us into the frigid
wasteland of the Russian steppes.
I lost all
track of time, all sense of reality and nearly killed Tomas when he
grabbed my arm to tell me it was finally our turn to fall back. I
was the last one onto the rickety, makeshift bridge and was only
halfway across, when a shell exploded slightly upriver from me. The
resultant wave swept me off the slippery log I was on and I was
carried off by the torrent.
I have no
idea how I survived, or how long I was unconscious. My first
memories after being washed away, were of being wrapped in warmth. I
opened my eyes, to find myself in the arms of a woman. Her face was
plastered in so much dirt and blood, that I couldn't tell if she was
beautiful or not. But at that moment, she was the most gorgeous
woman I had ever set eyes on.
She
introduced herself as Alyona, explaining that she was one of the
White Cossacks who worked as auxiliaries in the German army and had
been separated from her friends in the chaos of the fighting. I
only spoke a few words of Russian but luckily, Alyona spoke fluent
German and I knew enough of that to get by.
She told
me how she had eventually managed to cross the river much lower down
than the bridge. But no sooner had she reached safety, than she had
seen me being swept by. Fortunately, I had been in fairly shallow
water and she had been able to haul me out of the water and drag me
out of sight. Now, we were in a deserted cottage, somewhere in a
wood, on the western bank of the Gniloy Tikich.
At least
we were on the German side of the river, hopefully. But our
situation still wasn't good. I was just taking stock of our
surroundings, when it suddenly dawned on me that I was naked. So was
Alyona. I could see our uniforms draped over a table in the centre
of the room. We were wrapped in some blankets that had seen much
better days but now I was aware of it, I was definitely pressed
against female flesh.
I was
covered in small wounds and scratches, my body ached all over, I had
been fighting for... I had no idea how long. I had recently nearly
drowned but I still managed to get excited as my body realised what
was happening. I couldn't believe it. I was twenty three, one of
Hitler's elite soldiers and yet I blushed! I had killed so many men
that I had lost count long ago and didn't even see their faces in my
dreams any more. But I had never been with a woman.
Alyona
seemed to sense something had changed. “Are you OK?” She
whispered. We were so close, that I felt the warmth of her breath on
my cheek and it did nothing to ease my discomfort. Then she moved,
so that she could see me clearer and my member brushed against her
thigh.
“Oh.”
That was all either of us said. Alyona smiled at me, then like that
English nurse, Florence Nightingale, she carefully eased me back onto
the floor, rolling on top of me, so as not to let any of the heat
escape our blankets. She kissed me, my first ever kiss from anyone
other than my mother. But my mother's kiss had never done this to me
before.
Our lips
parted and I opened my eyes to find her watching me. Had I died?
Was this my reward? Was I really in Valhalla? Then I didn't care
any more. Alyona raised herself slightly, wriggled, another wriggle
and she gasped. I had thought Hnefatafl was good until now! The
game had suddenly lost all of its appeal. I couldn't do anything,
simply having to lie there and let Alyona set the pace. But that
suited me fine. This was the best thing that had ever happened to
me. We were both filthy, both of us stank, yet I wouldn't have
changed a thing. And of all my memories of my youth, this is the one
that I cherish the most nearly forty years later.
I could
feel Alyona's pert nipples digging into my chest, standing out in
contrast to the softness of her breasts. Her belly slid over mine as
she moved her hips, the sweat of her labours matting our bodies
together. And the longer we were locked together, the greater the
heat became, until a raging inferno filled my belly. Yet with all of
that passion locked in my loins, our kisses were the most gentle
things I had ever experienced. Though my body was a seething
maelstrom, our kisses were moments of total calm, that freed me of
the nightmares of my past.
And just
when I thought that I couldn't last a single second more, the look in
Alyona's eyes changed, so that I had a glimpse of creation. She let
out a soft moan and a tremor ran through her body, causing my release
as it reached my manhood. As she was calm, I was tempest, until
finally I was spent, cradling Alyona in my arms.
I have
spent much of my all too long life in a Russian gulag, never again
feeling the love and tenderness of a woman. I have no idea what
became of Alyona but hope that she lived a happy life, perhaps even
raising another Rus. And in my happiest dreams, telling him how she
shared a moment of bliss with his father amongst the carnage of a
long forgotten war.
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